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Autonomous Car Expert Thinks Self Driving Cars Will Lead To More En Route Hanky Panky.

A member of the media test drives a Tesla Motors Inc. Model S car equipped with Autopilot in Palo Alto, California, U.S., on Wednesday, Oct. 14, 2015. Tesla Motors Inc. will begin rolling out the first version of its highly anticipated "autopilot" features to owners of its all-electric Model S sedan Thursday. Autopilot is a step toward the vision of autonomous or self-driving cars, and includes features like automatic lane changing and the ability of the Model S to parallel park for you. Photographer: David Paul Morris/Bloomberg via Getty Images

Oh REALLY now? Be right back, buying a Tesla.

But in all seriousness, there is a report out there right now from autonomous vehicle expert Barrie Kirk of the Canadian Automated Vehicles Centre of Excellence saying that the arrival of autonomous cars will lead to more sex while driving. This begs the question, “People have sex while driving?” That answer is yes. We all learn that people engage in oral sex while driving, but people actually do have full on sex while driving too. And up until very recently there hasn’t been much in the way of autonomous driving. Mr. Kirk thinks that it will become a huge problem.


Federal bureaucrats are raising concerns about distracted driving in semi-autonomous cars that don’t require much input from the driver.

And at least one expert is anticipating that, as the so-called ‘smart’ cars get smarter, there will eventually be an increase in an unusual form of distracted driving: hanky-panky behind the wheel.

“I am predicting that, once computers are doing the driving, there will be a lot more sex in cars,” said Barrie Kirk of the Canadian Automated Vehicles Centre of Excellence.

“That’s one of several things people will do which will inhibit their ability to respond quickly when the computer says to the human, ‘Take over.”‘

Mr. Kirk thinks that we won’t be able to control ourselves and that will lead to more people practicing to make babies in the back seat while digital Jeeves chauffeurs us around.

Federal officials, who have been tasked with building a regulatory framework to govern driverless cars, highlighted their concerns in briefing notes compiled for Transport Minister Marc Garneau soon after he took on the portfolio last fall.

“The issue of the attentive driver is … problematic,” said one note contained in a stream of emails about Tesla’s so-called self-driving car.

“Drivers tend to overestimate the performance of automation and will naturally turn their focus away from the road when they turn on their auto-pilot,” said the note, obtained by The Canadian Press under the Access to Information Act.

“It really needs to be emphasized that these vehicles are not truly self-driving,” say officials, who predict that fully autonomous cars and trucks are “still a few years away.”

Here’s that example of a silly test with Tesla’s autopilot by some YouTubers. You can see, this isn’t a system that’s meant to be turned on and just forgotten about.

So until we have full autonomy, which will happen in the near future, keep it in your pants. In fact, just wait until you get home. Car boning is just uncomfortable.

(Sources: CBC News and YouTube)


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